Author Archives: Paul

…..is that it can give you a deep, bassy voice that you don’t normally possess. All blokes want a deep voice and the reason is very simple. If you do an impression of a eunuch, you immediately adopt a high-pitched voice. So a deep voice suggests the very opposite. Mine is so husky at the […]

I’ve been invited to a 90s party. A young person with a beard tells me I’ll love it because I’d have been out there “clubbing back in the day”. He added that they’ll be playing all the “oldies”. Oldies? To me this means music from the 60s, not the 90s. This was the decade that […]

Since his death yesterday, the musical legacy of Maurice White has undergone a sudden re-appraisal. Maurice (always pronounced Mo-reece) White was the leader of Earth, Wind & Fire and the fact that they were one of the greatest and most musically accomplished bands ever is being hastily acknowledged. But I’m pretty certain the cultural commentators […]

Like many people of a certain age who don’t look it, she’s started removing more and more candles from her cake. Trouble is, my wife never lies about her age. So if this habit continues, they’re soon going to be the same age. At the moment, it’s (just about) possible for them to be mother […]

The story is well-documented. One November night in 1974, Lord Lucan returned to his house in Belgravia and allegedly murdered his children’s nanny, mistaking her for his wife. He fled the house and was never seen again. His disappearance remains a mystery but the most plausible theory is that he was spirited overseas through a […]

Is the second day in a pair of jeans. We endure the first day when they’re newly washed – tight, stiff and uncomfortable. I’m enjoying that second day right now. They’ve softened, loosened and I feel like I’ve lost about a stone overnight. And if Le Serge de Nimes hasn’t got too grimy, a third […]

The old misanthrope celebrated his sixtieth birthday yesterday. I actually thought he was older than that, maybe because he’s been in the public eye for nearly forty years. Here he is at 21, being typically horrible, murdering The Stooges’ classic from the previous decade. Johnny Rotten was a creation every bit as artificial as Alvin […]

It’s only January and we’ve already lost three cultural icons. David Bowie, Alan Rickman and now Terry Wogan. I cannot remember a time when Wogan was not on TV or radio. He became a national treasure (before the phrase existed) on the Radio 2 Breakfast show in the 1970s, then in the 1980s presented Wogan, […]

Happy Birthday to my friend Mark Emberton who shares my addiction to outer garments. Unlike trousers or shoes, coats and jackets are just too easy to buy. Last week, in a charity shop I failed to resist an immaculate vintage 1960s Crombie overcoat. In its heavy cloth and black velvet collar, I was looking forward […]

Away fans are the true football fans. The staunch supporters who travel hundreds of miles to watch their team and bring noise and passion to every ground they visit. So, perversely, even at Loftus Road, I often prefer to sit with them. Whoever QPR are playing, I’ve usually got a mate who supports the other […]