Having a barbecue tonight? Me neither.

What is it about blokes and barbecues? They never normally go near the kitchen but give them raw meat, an open grill and a comedy apron and suddenly they’re Jamie Oliver. Except they’re not, are they? How many times have you only eaten charred chicken and burnt burgers because Barbecue Man has taken so long to prepare them that you’re on the point of malnutrition? That said, if I were at a fabulous barbecue on a balmy summer’s evening with succulent steaks and sizzling sausages, this would be the perfect accompaniment.