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Category Archives: Worlds Shortest Radio Show

Worlds Shortest Radio Show

The New Romantic Olympics.

Gary Kemp has a fabulous house on Fitzroy Square, paid for largely by the royalties he still receives for writing “Gold”. It’s been played hundreds of times across the BBC and across the world at every Olympics since 1984. It will be no doubt be played countless times again over the next two weeks. But […]

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I met him once, you know.

I’m talking about Tony Bennett, who celebrates his 90th birthday today. I was at a recording of Danny Baker’s BBC chat show about twenty years ago and Tony Bennett was a guest, promoting his Unplugged album. Great singers from Frank Sinatra to Amy Winehouse have proclaimed Tony Bennett the greatest of them all. And that […]

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Fifty years ago this weekend, this was not No.1.

It was No.5. Yet whenever England’s 1966 World Cup triumph is celebrated, this song is said to have been top of the charts. Its status as a British pop classic seems to match this nation’s greatest sporting achievement. Another myth about 1966 is that England were the best team in the world. Apparently not. Unimpressive […]

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One of my favourite writer’s favourite writer.

When I started in the despatch department of an ad agency, I never thought I could become a copywriter because I wasn’t sufficiently well-read. At school, I’d found Dickens tediously over-written, Shakespeare “of its time” and Chaucer just a 14th century Benny Hill. But one day, Richard Foster, one of advertising’s greatest copywriters, told me […]

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Owen Smith has just blown it.

He was hoping to become Prime Minister by first challenging Jeremy Corbyn for the Labour leadership. But with one crass remark yesterday, he blew it. He urged Labour to “smash Theresa May back on her heels”. What a weird and disturbing thing to say. It might be (just about) acceptable to the sexist, male-dominated trade […]

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Why aren’t “the punks” more excited by Brexit?

This is what they wanted, wasn’t it? A bit of anarchy in the UK? Sticking it to the establishment, two fingers to the governing elite. Surely Brexit is the most punk thing to have happened since, well, punk. Except that punk wasn’t very “punk” at all. It was a relatively small, principally middle-class phenomenon, and […]

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Russian athletes escape ban from Olympics.

Well, what a surprise. Despite strong and plausible allegations about state-sponsored doping affecting the whole squad, the IOC has decided not to ban them. Which suggests that the Russians may be as adept at bribery as they are at doping. Though I’m all in favour of allowing athletes to ingest unlimited quantities of performance-enhancing drugs. […]

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The sound of children’s laughter.

…is a truly joyous sound. Though maybe not at 7.30 in the morning, seven days a week. But courtesy of the Weird Kids Next Door, that’s what we endure. They leap on to their trampoline every morning, squealing and yelping. You’d think the novelty might have worn off but no, their delight remains volubly undiminished. […]

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Sam the Sham?

Let’s hope not. Sam Allardyce has been named the new England manager, though his appointment has not been greeted with huge enthusiasm. Or even the expectations that greeted the appointments of Fabio Capello and Sven Goran-Eriksson. Big Sam is seen as a lumpen journeyman who thinks tactics are a a kind of mint. I don’t […]

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This isn’t just any track….

A few years ago, I was writing some of those food porn commercials for M&S that always began “This isn’t just any…” and they decided to change the music. They’d used Santana’s Samba Pa Ti for years, wanted something similar but different for their new summer range and I was asked to make suggestions. This […]

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