Category Archives: Worlds Shortest Radio Show
I knew I’d seen him before somewhere.
In fact, I’d seen him twice. Both times in Waitrose and you couldn’t help but stare. 6 foot 6 and carrying the most impressive physique I’ve ever seen, this bloke was a truly magnificent example of our species. I wondered what he did for a living and I now I know. He hits people. In […]

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next
1971
Just reading David Hepworth’s new book about 1971, in which he argues that it was the greatest ever year for popular music. True, a case can be made other years but the case for 1971 is a particularly strong one. Maggie May, Life on Mars, Stairway to Heaven, Ain’t No Sunshine, Brown Sugar, You’ve Got […]

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next
The ill-mannered man.
He’d be aghast at being described in this way. He’s always charming, always courteous and always smartly dressed. Too smartly dressed. And that’s the problem. The definition of good manners is making the other person feel comfortable but this man’s too-immaculate apparel has the opposite effect. I saw him today and for once he wasn’t […]

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next
The best Two Ronnies sketch ever.
Ronnie Corbett died yesterday and a fond nation paid tribute. Social media was filled with contributors’ favourite Two Ronnies sketches, usually the famous Mastermind spoof where Ronnie Corbett answers the question before last and of course the classic “Fork Handles”. But this is my favourite, even though it features neither Ronnie C nor Ronnie B. […]

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next
Geek Chic.
Happy Birthday to my old friend Peter Horne. We were at school together and, I’m sure he won’t mind me saying this, he was the clever, bespectacled geek from Central Casting. But guess what? He didn’t care. While most of his classmates supported Arsenal or Spurs, Pete was a staunch fan of Wealdstone FC. He […]

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next
Frank Skinner for a fiver.
I love the Soho Theatre. Arena-filling comedians often do a few nights there, trying out new material in this tiny venue for a forthcoming tour. Last night I went along with my son to see Frank Skinner who had no material at all. It didn’t matter. He is one of the most naturally funny people […]

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next
I’m not going to charge you for this.
These are usually welcome words but on one occasion they were the harbingers of doom. I was about fifteen and had gone to the barber’s for a quick trim. The barber asked if I’d mind if the young apprentice cut my hair but within minutes, I could see in the huge mirror in front of […]

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next
The Imagination of the Pet Shop Boys.
Bit of a PetShopFest at the moment, as the 30th anniversary of their debut album is celebrated on radio and TV. Neil Tennant remains the more vocal Pet Shop Boy. As Assistant Editor of Smash Hits, he knew just to how to appeal to kids and more mature music fans alike but I always found […]

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next
This one’s for you, Jesus.
It’s that time of the year again. Come on, you know what to do…

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next
Bad Friday.
Good Friday was always the most miserable day in the Catholic calendar. As a child, I remember any display of cheer being strictly forbidden and every Catholic household being subject to a blanket ban on all forms of enjoyment. It got worse. At 3 o’clock, we had to endure a horrible sombre church service where […]

- I'm hopeless ...14th Aug 2013
- The Strangler...13th Aug 2013
- I do love Lon...12th Aug 2013
- As we get old...11th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- There are man...10th Aug 2013
- Can you name ...9th Aug 2013
- Do you rememb...7th Aug 2013
- Ever heard of...6th Aug 2013
- Shouldn't wor...6th Aug 2013
- I'm sure Pete...5th Aug 2013
- I came out of...4th Aug 2013
- Having a barb...3rd Aug 2013
- Sometimes I j...2nd Aug 2013
- These people ...1st Aug 2013 prev next