Category Archives: Worlds Shortest Radio Show

To the Everyman in Muswell Hill to see 45 Years, the acclaimed new film with Charlotte Rampling and Tom Courtenay. Beautifully acted but deathly dull, it centres on a forlorn, wistful couple who’ve been married for 45 years. The film makes that seem like a very long time ago. 1950s hits like Smoke Gets In […]

Happy 70th birthday to Sir George Ivan Morrison. The “terrible” obviously doesn’t refer to his music, but to his infamously foul and choleric temperament. There are too many examples to list here but they are nothing when set against the countless examples of his musical brilliance. With Van Morrison, it’s hard to know where to […]

I was in Bethnal Green this morning and saw an exhibition about the Kray Twins entitled “Legend”, to tie in with the forthcoming biopic also called “Legend” with Tom Hardy playing both twins. I’ve always found them fascinating but don’t buy the old “They was good boys, only ever hurt their own” mantra. That may […]

Incredible that in 2015, we still have a programme called “Woman’s Hour”. Dated, patronising and sexist, it implies that women needn’t worry their pretty little heads about the rest of Radio 4’s output. That’s for those brainy men, but here’s an hour for you ladies filled with recipes and knitting patterns. Of course it’s nothing […]

Because that’s all I ever played, before mixing it into another tune. When I was DJ-ing, I played every Friday night at Le Beat Route in Greek Street. And this was the rather obvious way I’d open my set. But it worked really well. And I worked really hard until 3am. Right now I’m sitting […]

It’s a replica of an old Smith’s wall clock. When I saw the Smith’s of London logo, I was hit by a Proustian rush of nostalgia. Smith’s Industries had a huge factory in Cricklewood which, when I was a child, employed about 8,000 people including several members of my family. That logo adorned the railway […]

Some people think they were, since this was their only hit. No.2 in the summer of 1970, it sold more than two million copies worldwide. So Hotlegs could be forgiven for thinking they’d hit the big time. But they hadn’t. Their next single flopped and their brief moment of fame seemed to be over. Hotlegs […]

69 today. How amusingly appropriate. As is this famous song. Oh for heaven’s sake, what did you think it was about?

Simply because he’s calls himself “Andy”. Some abbreviations are fine for politicians – Tony, Bill, Chris, Tom. Others are not. Which is why we didn’t have Dave Cameron, Johnny Major or Jamie Callaghan. The British electorate are a fickle bunch and, while they may well have voted for Andrew Burnham, they won’t be voting for […]

They can’t resist a pun for a name and the more excruciating, the more I like them: British Hairways, Sherlock Combs, Curl Up & Dye and Barber Streisand are just a few of my favourites. The chip shops aren’t far behind. Chip & Fin, The Codfather, The Frying Squad and Oh My Cod! immediately spring […]