Category Archives: Worlds Shortest Radio Show
Ken Livingstone behind me in Waitrose.
And there are few things more disgusting to those of us who lean to the left than a horrible, right-wing politician, obsessed with money and power, who pretends to be a socialist. A man who lied, cheated and smear-campaigned his way into parliament. A scheming, joyless creep whose miserable legacy will be the words “No […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next
Do you know what a “penthouse” is?
A luxury top-floor apartment? Yes and no. That’s what it means now but when skyscrapers were first built, and this song was first written, the penthouse was the little concrete shed on the roof where the janitor lived. So these lyrics speak of romance blossoming even in cramped, unpromising surroundings. Though whenever I hear it, […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next
Tonight will you be supporting Germany or Argentina?
They’re both old enemies of ours. Not just in football but in far more serious conflicts. So which flag will you be waving? Mine will be red, yellow and black because when Germany have beaten us in major tournaments, it’s generally been fairly and squarely. Not the case with Argentina. In the 1998 World Cup, […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next
My sister used to live on a houseboat….
…..19 year-olds could do that sort of thing back in the day. Renting was easy and cheap so she and her bohemian flatmates used to move across London quite regularly. They took their floor cushions and joss sticks from Earls Court to Belsize Park and then to a barge moored on the Thames near Richmond […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next
“Produced in Salford”? Not any more.
The most galling thing about Radio 4 is its insistence on saying “Produced in Salford” after every programme made there. They never say “Produced in London” after those made at Broadcasting House. “Produced in Salford” rubs taxpayers’ noses in the fact that the BBC spent £1 billion of public money, shifting TV and radio production […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next
Brazil 1 Germany 7.
Without question, the most shocking and incredible result in World Cup history. Especially as it was Brazil, host nation and favourites to win the tournament. Since re-unification, we’ve really grown to love the Germans. They’re just like us but better at football. And at making cars. And washing machines. But not music. With the exception […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next
She married a Frenchman and fled to Hong Kong.
She was quite posh, lived in Fulham and was never really my girlfriend. But we used to go out occasionally and always to places she didn’t usually go. I took her to QPR, I took her late night shopping for soul CDs at Tower Records which was open till midnight then on for even later-night […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next
Happy Birthday to Ringo Starr.
74 today. Which means he was 33 when he had a big hit with this. Everybody loved it, big singalong favourite. Ringo of course, is not guilty of doing anything untoward. But given what’s come to light about other 1970s celebrities, it now sounds slightly wrong for a 33 year-old man to be singing “You […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next
Only one place to be this afternoon.
Frith Street, celebrating the 65th birthday of Bar Italia, the greatest coffee bar in the world. A wonderfully unchanged piece of old Soho and the forerunner of 21st Century independent coffee culture. There’s going to be a street party – Ray Gelato will of course be performing. As will Suggs and other patrons of 22 […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next
My God, isn’t she posh?
I’m talking about Lily Allen, who was on Desert Island Discs this morning. I always knew she was more refined in real life than she pretends to be on record but I hadn’t realised just how “mock” her mockney accent was. Why do so many middle-class people do this? Not content with being privileged, they […]

- Farewell to m...18th Mar 2014
- I'm not going...17th Mar 2014
- I went to Hel...16th Mar 2014
- In defence of...15th Mar 2014
- The man who s...14th Mar 2014
- I've got the ...13th Mar 2014
- For some reas...12th Mar 2014
- Just because ...11th Mar 2014
- Well, we got ...10th Mar 2014
- It happens ev...9th Mar 2014
- RIP Harold Ra...8th Mar 2014
- To the 606 Cl...7th Mar 2014
- Young, gifted...6th Mar 2014
- So what are y...5th Mar 2014
- Hooray! In S...4th Mar 2014 prev next