I was at the seaside today and, and as always, got myself a little portion of cockles and whelks, soused in malt vinegar. As I walked towards the seafood stall, this song came into my head. Well, just the line “I’m like a one-eyed cat peeping in a seafood store”. It was only then, after all these years, I suddenly realised what that actually meant and how fabulously obscene the whole song is.
Cockles and whelks.

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