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It’s never going to happen.

British society has been wonderfully enriched by the culture of India and South Asia. So much so that Chicken Tikka Masala is considered Britain’s favourite dish. Yet no matter how many times we’re told that Bollywood is going to be “the next big thing”, we’re not interested. Bollywood is already a big thing – a phenomenally big thing – in India and in Asian communities all over the world. But it doesn’t seem to have the universal appeal of other musical and cinematic genres. The nearest we got to embracing it was this one-off hit from 1982. But the BBC, with yet another Bollywood “season” or Bollywood documentary on BBC Four still try to force it upon us. We love Indian food, we love Indian people, this afternoon we were loving the Indian summer, but Indian films? Nah, not really.

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