I’ve never really drunk alcohol. I have no objection to it, just never liked it. Even I’m surprised by this, given that I’m common, half-Irish and have always worked in advertising. Mine should have been a life awash with booze but somehow the taste for it continues to elude me. Years ago, it was easier to say that I was a recovering alcoholic than to admit that I’d never managed to finish a whole pint of Guinness. Now that’s not such an issue. Abstinence has become almost normal. Yesterday, Lloyd’s of London announced that employees were forbidden alcohol between 9am and 5pm. So the City, like the advertising industry, is becoming is now far more sober and far less fun. Weirdly, I’m not keen on teetotallers, especially when their number includes Sadiq Khan and Donald Trump. So there’s only one thing for it – I’m going to have to take up drinking.
Oh, they’re all at it now.

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