Author Archives: Paul

I know that sounds like the beginning of a Les Dawson routine but all I’m going to say about my mother-in-law is that she looks exactly like Petula Clark. I met Petula Clark a couple of years ago with David Gest at Vanessa Feltz’s valentine’s party (now there’s a sentence I never thought I’d write) […]

Don’t you hate people who say that? Instead of saying, “Sorry?” – a polite apology for not hearing you, they say “Say again”, commanding you to repeat yourself as though you’re to blame for their failure to hear you. Now I know that, when he sits at the piano, Sir Elton looks increasingly like Mrs. […]

……not when there was stuff like this to listen to. And I mean listen. This sort of soul had a far more interesting tale to tell. Songs about divorce, adultery and lives really lived. It all sounded so intoxicatingly grown-up. It still does, especially this one. It’s like a whole movie in about four minutes. […]

Compared with a generation ago, it’s far less remarkable now to be openly gay.  That said, my friend Graeme is sitcom gay – handsome, flamboyant and effusive. He and I went to the theatre last night and he turned up with Keren from Bananarama. Of course he did. Though he hadn’t realised that I was […]

…..is the application of bum to seat. It’s very difficult to simply sit down, have a good idea and write it. Going for a walk invariably loosens the thought process and allows ideas to come to fruition. We all have our “wandering aimlessly around” track to accompany us, and this is mine. Especially apt because […]

We called them the ELECTRIC LIGHT Orchestra, as though they were an orchestra made of electric lights. We should have said ELECTRIC Light Orchestra, a light orchestra with electric instruments. Much easier to call them ELO and recognise two things. Theirs was a hefty, worthwhile contribution to popular music. And Mr Blue Sky was not […]

Last day of September and the forecast is dry with sunny spells. So no “September in the Rain”. I should have played this on that Friday about three weeks ago when it absolutely lashed down but I forgot. Never mind, I thought, bound to rain again soon but it didn’t, so today this song isn’t […]

It’s Sunday, so millions of people are. Though I doubt David Byrne is one of them. He’s been working furiously all his life. He founded Talking Heads and practically invented American new wave music before forging a successful solo career, writing avant garde-orchestral pieces and working in theatre and film. He’s just published a book […]

……..but this record could have turned me into one. Just listen to the lyrics. Paul Anka wrote them and Sir Tom sings them with just a little too much conviction. Huge hit in its day and a frequent accompaniment to beauty contests on ITV. What was that, Tom? “I never would abuse her” and “She […]