Category Archives: Worlds Shortest Radio Show
A Christmas Conundrum.
Apparently this came out years ago but I’d never heard it until last week. I loved it. No idea who it was but I loved it. Then I discovered it was Coldplay. I don’t like Coldplay therefore I can’t like this. But I do. It’s a fantastic version. Oh no, does this mean I’ll be […]

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next
Ian Dury’s Christmas hit?
That was the rumour at the time. It certainly sounds like him and the record came out on Stiff, his record label. The Snowmen never revealed their identity. They appeared on Top of the Pops – well, some people miming and disguised as snowmen did – so we still don’t know who they were. The […]

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next
Can Christmas carols ever be cool?
Probably not. Especially given their increasingly ridiculous-sounding subject matter in our ever more secular society. They can be beautiful, they can be poetic, they can evoke the warmth and happiness of childhood Christmases long, long ago. But cool? Nah, no Christmas carol has ever been cool. Except maybe this one.

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next
An essential part of Christmas….
……is saying “It doesn’t feel like Christmas”. Because it never does. You no longer take part in the Nativity play, sing carols at school or believe in Father Christmas. And although it snows every year on EastEnders, it hasn’t actually snowed in London on Christmas Day since 1970. But today, less than a week before […]

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next
Demise of the Special One.
Jose Mourinho is the most successful manager in Chelsea’s history. But yesterday they sacked him for the second time. On this occasion, just seven months after he’d led them to the Premier League title. It’s true that the collapse in their form has been startling. Chelsea have gone from champions to relegation contenders almost overnight. […]

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next
Ground Control to Major Tim.
Congratulations to Major Tim Peake, the first Briton to join the International Space Station. Too obvious to salute his achievement with Space Oddity. Or with Ashes to Ashes, Bowie’s other big hit featuring the ill-fated Major Tom. Far better to unearth this hypnotic disco gem. Especially as another term for International Space Station would be……Space […]

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next
To St. Mark’s in Dalston…
…for my daughter’s last school carol service. Like a lot of people without a religious bone in their bodies, I love churches. And especially this one. St. Mark’s is huge, dark, gothic and glorious. Not in a pretty and immaculately kept sort of way, but in the hauntingly beautiful atmosphere which makes its Victorian past […]

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next
I often switch on Radio 4 around 10am…
…and six days a week, I have to switch it straight off again. During the week, it’s Woman’s Hour – a horribly dated programme which somehow manages to patronise both women and men. And on Sunday, it’s the Archers Omnibus which, if anything, is even worse. A lame soap opera which follows the contrived tribulations […]

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next
(Very) ol’ Blue Eyes.
Frank Sinatra would have been 100 today. In the 1940s he was an international star but then his career went into serious decline. Its nadir must have been a show he did in the early 50s at the Kilburn State, which was practically at the end of my road. Apparently, it was half empty and […]

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next
Christmas Hits you never hear anymore.
I met up with my friend Brian Jones yesterday and he reminded me of a long-forgotten (I wonder why) Christmas hit from the 70s. Regarded as innocent knockabout fun in 1974, it now sounds so, so wrong. I’m going to play it because you sure as hell won’t hear it anywhere else.

- Completely ou...10th Aug 2018
- Ever wondered...9th Aug 2018
- Edinburgh.8th Aug 2018
- To me, to you...6th Aug 2018
- The Poet.5th Aug 2018
- My sister got...4th Aug 2018
- Those I have ...2nd Aug 2018
- I bet he's gl...1st Aug 2018
- RIP Paul Made...31st Jul 2018
- Yes, yes, Dav...29th Jul 2018
- How did you f...28th Jul 2018
- Am I allowed ...27th Jul 2018
- King Kenny.10th Jun 2018
- The death of ...7th Jun 2018
- "We're" now i...27th May 2018 prev next